Thursday, September 8, 2011

i think i got it ...

i have sat down so many times recently to write a blog post and then have completely blanked on what to write.  i have had so many things swimming around in my brain too, but when i went to write them down the words just would not come.

but, now i think i get it.  after elijah's tonsillectomy recovery which seemed to last forever and ever (poor boy) we had family come to visit which was really nice.  then we had an earthquake, a tropical storm, we lost power for a day and a half, our cars broke , uncle david died.  we needed to get to the funeral so we rented a car so we could get to dan's parents' house.  we stayed an extra day with his family then came home to find out dan's lawyer was trying to get in touch with him all day.  did i mention we are being sued?  our car broke down this week, the one we are trying to get rid of.  now our other car is getting fixed and our town is flooding from all the rain we have gotten this week.  madelyn went downstairs to watch a movie today and we found the basement had 4 inches of water throughout.  our basement which i have always been able to boast that it never gets wet.  what is that verse about boasting?  the nice firemen came to pump it out and soon after they left we realized it was flooding again.  huge bummer.

anyway, all that to say that at different times throughout all of these ordeals i have said that i am thankful that we are all healthy.  that is not something us tubbses are usually able to say, but lately it is and for that i am thankful. 

that's not all though.  tonight i realized that we have literally had almost all of our earthly possessions threatened in some way.over the last few weeks.  and you know what?  who cares?  seriously.  who cares?  it's just stuff. 

tonight before dan got home i was thinking about how he has to come home to deal with our basement after dealing with the school's flooded basement and all that we have been going through in the last few weeks and i thought, "i wouldn't want to go through all of this yuck with anyone but him."  we could  lose everything and be living in a box, but as long as we have each other and our kids are healthy we will be fine.  i think we are beginning to not even want all of this stuff.  ugh.  who needs it?  we have to throw so much stuff away from our basement now, but it almost feels freeing. 

the worst part is that the paneling on the wall has to come off and that is going to be a job and a half.  i'm not sure how that is going to go.  our basement is just going to be stripped bare.  that is craziness, but it's fine. 

so, all i am saying is, "God?  Are you there?  I get it now.  I know where my true treasures lie.  I am not clinging to my belongings or wishing/hoping for more stuff, more money, more car, or more house.  I'm done.  I am happy."  i really mean that too.  i have such a peace inside and it's a bit unsettling in some ways because it makes me wonder what God is preparing me for.  eek!  don't people say stuff like this before packing it all up and moving to china or something?  oh boy.  i better end it here.

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